Here I go again…..

Those who are close to me know that for the last couple of years, I have been trying to get into medical school. For those who have just joined me on my bloggy journey, if you’re interested, you can have a read of my experience so far in this post. I’ve always wanted to be a Doctor. I can’t see myself in any other career but medicine. I want to practice medicine so badly that it hurts to think of a future where I’m not doing it. What I’ve been doing so far, in regards to employment, has just been that – something that I do to pay the bills. No interest, no passion, no joy. In order for me to have a shot at getting into medical school, I need to sit a monster of an entrance test (called GAMSAT) that is held at the end of March every year. This test is five and a half hours of physical and mental pain. Today, I found out that registration for this test is now available. When I found out that I had missed the cut this year, I was really disappointed but I was determined that I would have another crack next year. But now that registrations are open, I have mixed feelings. I know in my heart that medicine is my calling, but I’m having doubts about whether I can actually get there. Am I a smart enough? Am I dreaming about something that is just unachievable? The roller coaster of emotions going through the process of trying to get into medical school (it basically takes 9 to 10 months to just find out if you get offered a place), has been incredibly taxing. And my emotions have not been the only thing that has been negatively affected; every aspect of my life has suffered to some degree because of my dedication to this cause. Reflecting on my failed efforts this year made me realise that months of study and isolation from everyone and everything I hold dear, is not how I want to live my life. That’s why this time around, I’m doing things differently:

• I’ve started revision a lot earlier, in the hope that I will have more time for study as well as life in general.
• I’ve joined a study group so I’m not doing this on my own.
• I’m scheduling in more social time, so I can maintain my personal relationships.
• I’m doing more of the things that I love, which includes cooking and this blog.

I’m hoping that these changes, which is aimed at balancing my life more, will help me do better in the test next year. And as a result, will get me what I want – to get into medical school and become a Doctor. As I type this blog post, I have the registration site up in another browser window, ready to enter my details. Here I go again….. Did someone say a third time’s a charm?

Image courtesy of ACER.

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